smells like fun: 04/01/2002

Saturday, April 27

Now that I am an employed person, I am pleased to find that weekends actually mean something. So do public holidays. But this whole waking up early thing is taking it's toll. I keep wishing I never swapped my normal bed for the futon- it means there's an extra metre to stand up when I have to get out of bed.

Why do I always get sick at the most inconvenient times? Rani and Michelle are finally coming home from their overseas jaunts after 8 months and I'm sick as a dog, just when I need all my strength up to party like it's 1999. Why is life so unfair? Why, Why?

Thursday, April 25

Lat night I worked at the Tool concert last night at the Sydney Entertainment Centre. I wonder if fans of this band do not realise they are getting the piss taken out of them by the band themselves when they turn up for one of these concerts. Firstly, they purchase t-shirts with the word "Tool" written across the front, like they are advertising the fact they are an idiot (or dickhead, if you will). Then the lead singer spends the whole time standing at the back of the stage with his back to the crowd. Also, the music is so loud it makes blood trickle out your earholes. So in a nutshell, I believe that one must be very self-loathing to be a Tool fan.

By the way my brand spanking new job that I started on Monday is going well (touch wood etc). Everyone in the office is incredibly laid back, friendly and nice, in fact the vibe is almost the antithesis of a corporate law firm. People actually look at you weirdly if you stay back after five, so I hope this warm fluffyness continues. I have training for the next two weeks which is going to whip me into a highly competent and efficient legal editor..... so hang on to your hats for more news about that kids! wheeee!

I forgot to mention that while I was in Melbourne the comedy festival was in full swing, so we went and saw a few shows. The best performance I saw was by Sue Murphy, a totally unreal American who took the piss from americans and people who lived in Los Angeles. I laughed so much I had tears streaming down my face.

Where to begin? Melbourne was excellent, excellent, excellent. It's like a ginormous funky country town, with good food. I was glad to discover that the quotient of dag to trendy people was about the same as it is here in Sydney, so I needn't have stressed myself so much. But I did do quite a bit of shopping. Penne's house in Southbank is so close to everything, I'd set out each day from there and do my thing, which ended up consisting of sitting in cafes, drinking coffee and reading, then shopping some more, then a bit more, then jumping on a tram and hoping it would take me in generally the right direction to wherever I next felt like sitting in a cafe and reading and shopping some more.
St. Kilda really is cool but The Secret Life of Us makes it look like it is permanently 28 degrees and sunny, when in fact I discovered it was usually 15 degrees, overcast and pretty windy. Oh TV, you've lied to me yet again.

Tuesday, April 16

Sick of Bridget, am returning to normal mode:

I was disturbed to find that Passions, one of my favourite television shows did a switcheroony of one of the main characters, Kay the Bitch. She is now being played by a completely different actor who also happens to have long black hair, but the resemblance stops there. Her makeup is all different and she doesn't say her lines with the same conviction.

Am in efficient Bridget Jones mode:

Cigarettes- 2 passive from Dave smoking in his room upstairs
Alcohol units- nil
caffeine units- nil
drug units- nil

Am very proud of my 2 alcohol free nights. Plan to make up for it in Melbourne. Weather forecast for Melbourne tomorrow- overcast 23 degrees. Have decided to take only one scarf. Unpack. Penne tells me there is pool in her apartment. Have packed cossies (sorry "bathers" in Melb-speak.) Practice saying "Pot of Carlton" instead of "Schooner of VB"- apparently Victoria Bitter not as popular in Victoria as in New South Wales. Unpack toiletry bag, take out tweezers and nail scissors- Heather warns security at airport still very tight. Thanks to Osama Bin Laden will be a hairy long-nailed freak. Will never fit in with style-conscious Melbournians. Damn@!

Monday, April 15

I am going to try and write like Bridget Jones for a while to see if it takes.

Cigarettes- nil
alcohol units- nil
chocolate units- 2 tim tams
Drugs- 2 nurofen

Off to Melbourne on Wednesday. Flight at noon, QF431. Trying to pack bags and fit in as many fashionable outfits as possible. Am intimidated by Melbournian reputation for always looking fashionable, even when grocery shopping. 5 skirts too many for 4 day holiday? Meeting Heather at Qantas check-in for coffee, will get her to try and help me get upgrade to Business Class (she works for Qantas).

I forgot to mention that last friday I was walking through the city on my way back from Ken's place. I stopped at the traffic lights on Elizabeth Street to cross the road and out of the corner of my eye I noticed that a really tall guy was standing beside me. I looked up to find I was actually in the presence of Ian Thorpe, swimming superstar and gay icon. He had a large Cartier bag under his arm. Who was the lucky recipient, I wonder?

Friday, April 12

Hurrah for me! I'm going to Melbourne for a holiday next week, and will crash at Penelope's place in Southbank. I'm going to go shopping, see comedians at the comedy festival, fart around St Kilda and enjoy myself to the full until Sunday, when I will return and enter the scary world of Full-Time Employment. To be honest, the prospect of Full-Time Employment is freaking me out a bit. Will I be able to handle it? Waking up at 7, wearing suits? I guess we can only wait and see.

Almost as worrisome as this picture. Zoom in and concentrate and see if you can find what's wrong with it.

Tuesday, April 9

I am sick of hearing about what a total legend the Queen Mum is so I've posted a new poll. Please feel free to express your nastiest fantasy.

So what am I going to do with my last 13 days of freedom? It's such a worry.

Well ladies and germs, I have finally got myself a job. As of the 22nd I am no longer Rachael-dole bludger, but Rachael-legal editor. I know I should be happy but I can't help thinking how I'm going to miss sleeping in and watching Passions. Especially now Theresa knows Ethan loves her back and Charity has the evil necklace and is about to take revenge on her sister for dumping the fishguts on her at the prom.

Wednesday, April 3

I am back at my parents house in Terrigal for a fleeting visit. Mum and Dad and my sister Eleena are sitting in the lounge room with my parentals best friends Mark and Michelle. I'd better go back in there because all I can hear is my name, followed by short bursts of laughter. They all thought it was hillarious when earlier this evening, at a restaurant in Terrigal, Dad was trying to be nice to the waitress and said "you're accent is unusual, where are you from?" She said "south africa, but I'm trying to lose my accent".
But unfortunately, a few minutes later I spoke louder than I meant to and said "hey dad get that south african chick back here, I wanna order dessert" and she was standing right behind me.

Hoorah! This blog now turns up in google web searches under my name. That could either be a good thing or not, i'm not sure yet.

smells like fun